Wednesday, March 05, 2014

Dear Russia: Goats, Unicorns, Babies, Spam can all be found here.

I'm amused that some of my labels increase the Russian and Eastern European traffic exponentially. Since said labels are "This Isn't Porn" and "These Are Not the Penises You're Looking For" I'd say they're not reading closely enough...after all, I think it's pretty goddamned clear.

So hello, all you porn-surfing-peeps who accidentally arrived at my page! For you, I have the dirtiest picture currently in my phone. Behold the filth:

I'm unimpressed.

You guys know this will only increase my religious dating/enlargements/get-a-loan-now spam quotient, right?


  1. Ewww! That's filthy. If it brings more Russian surfers/spammers to your blog, I think we have a problem.

    I once wrote a blog post titled "Early Morning Booty Call from My Sister-in-law." As you can imagine, it's the top search phrase sending traffic to me. Number two is "These Bloodthirsty Girls Are Getting Way Too Friendly."

    1. I wish Google Analytics still gave me the search phrases: they were hilarious. Also, either of those could be a Lifetime TV movie title, and that's just excellent.

    2. Those are too good. Last week, I blogged about how paranoid I became after reading a book about serial killers. I listed some of the people discussed in the book, and I can't help but anticipate a crush of soon-to-be-disappointed creepers searching for stuff about Jeffrey Dahmer and the like.


Unload your brainpan, but please prove you're not a Russian spam-bot. Or Skynet. I don't want the T1000 after me.